Oprah, a cultural bastion of wisdom and followers, has once again disappointed me.
She was interviewing the GOP candidate who won't go away (Sarah Palin) and Sarah's daughter Bristol. Here is the video if you'd like to view it: Oprah's Failure
This is the only clip I could find. This clip has been edited, the original has Oprah saying something to the affect of, "I just wanted to give you an opportunity to take a step back from that statement." But Bristol refused to.
So, in this clip Oprah says to Bristol, "I bristled when I read that you said 'I'm not going to have sex before I'm married, I can guarantee it.'" Oprah then goes on to ask, "Why set yourself up for failure like that?" Excuse me?
Here's what I want to know: When did a dedication to abstinence become unreasonable? We expect youth/young adults to remain abstinent from other things! (Marijuana, Tobacco, Steroids, Texting while driving, Etc)
What did Oprah want Bristol to say? "I'm gonna try not to have sex?" "I've been thinking about it and I'm probably not going to have sex again until I'm married."
Which statement sets Bristol up for more failure: "Maybe I'll have sex, maybe I won't but I'll try not to." (Guess what, if she says this, she will!) or "I'm guaranteeing that I will not have sex again until I'm married." By saying this she knows that people will hold her accountable! It makes the decision not to have sex easier because sex now comes with two things: a baby and public ridicule. (Oh, I forgot, in our culture we don't like accountability.)
And, Oprah, even if you want to believe that a generic youth making this guarantee is setting themself up for failure, who is more likely to know that she's not going to have sex: The anonymous 15 year old who has never done it or the mother of a 13 month old who knows what sex leads to and who has been in the public eye for at least 2 years? Hmmm... Tough one...
In the following scenarios, which statement is more likely to set the speaker up for failure:
"I'm gonna try to stop smoking..."
"I'm quiting, I'm never going to smoke again."
"I'm gonna try to stop lying..."
"I'm going to be honest in my relationships. Period."
"I'm gonna try not to drink in college."
"I will not break the law by drinking while underage."
Now let's pretend that Bristol didn't go on Oprah's show and express certainty about something Oprah doesn't agree with. Let's pretend that Bristol went on Oprah's show and was luke warm about something Oprah is passionate about. What would that conversation have sounded like? I submit that it would have gone something like this:
Bristol: "I'm gonna seriously consider lowering my carbon footprint."
Oprah: "What do you mean 'Seriously consider?' This is something that you have to do. We all have to do it! Right, everyone?" (Cheers from the audience) "Now, what do you say? Are you gonna try? or are you gonna do it!?"
I wonder if Oprah's ever guaranteed that she was going to help those girls in Africa who attend her school? Or if she's been certain that she's going to keep her weight from fluctuating. I hope not. If she did, she's only setting herself up for failure.
