Thursday, January 31, 2008

Forget Change!

ATHF: A year ago, we were admonished to



and we must not. Seven cities were the victims of this heartless advertising campaign and only one (Boston) had the courage enough to freak out beyond reason. Bostonians can rest assured; should another rogue company attempt to advertise in their city, the vile perpetrators will be arrested and heavily fined.

Also, let this serve as a warning to any and all moon beings that think they can come here and terrorize us with their funny little movies, and inventive PR. We will have none of it.

I, for one, will never forget!

The Election: I have a question for a few of the people running for President. Namely, the people whose major talking point is "Changing Washington." I've heard this sentiment primarily from two different sources: Hillary and Barrak. (McCain also fits the next qualifications for answering this question, but I haven't heard the "change" mantra from him...) Now, both of these people are Senators. Which means they are both in Washington. So here's my question:

What, exactly, would be changing about Washington if one of them were to simply move their office?

Besides, of course, the person who would take their place in the Senate. Sounds to me like these two people are encouraging everyone to vote for someone not currently in Washington. A current or former Governor, perhaps? A retired Senator? A non-political candidate? I'm not really sure, but I can tell you this: I'm fairly certain I'm going to be taking their advice and voting for someone who will actually change the face of Washington, not just move their stuff.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

200 & Counting!

Though it took me nearly twice as long to reach 200 posts as it did to reach 100, I've finally reached this milestone. (There were six months where I had either 1 or absolutely zero posts!) But, I have attained 200 and, therefore, like any aspect of popular culture (Am I selling myself a bit high there?), here is my second "look back" at the last 100 posts.

When you've had more than one "recap" episode, usually you mention the first one and what a great success it was. You won't want to miss the first 100!

And now, we take a glance at the recurring characters:

Immigration: This has always been a contentious topic. No posts have more comments than the ones were I suggest that we tighten up our boarders and actually obey our own laws. (That comment was probably just edgy enough to warrant a few comments of its own.)

The NFL Power Rankings: I never really figured out if anyone read these with the exception of one reader who was nice enough to let me know that they were important to her. If not for her comment on week 8, I might have stopped them entirely. If you wanna revisit any of the weeks here they are: NFL Preview, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, Post Season preview I, Post Season preview II, and Super Bowl previews.

Politics: Next to sports, politics was the second most common character during these past 100 posts. The mid-term and up-coming elections taking the spotlight in this category. With Global Warming, local politics and the Spin Cycle (which could become a regular section) rounding out the top 5.

The Red Sox: There has been a surprising lack of Red Sox talk over the last 100! Some discussion because Ortiz deserved the MVP and didn't get it in '06. Then some brief comments about the fantastic surreal World Series run in '07.

Finally, our most recurring character: Barry Bonds: This really bugs me. Every time I mentioned him I said it was probably, hopefully, most likely the final time. Yeah, Barry appeared eight times during the past 100 posts. Thankfully, as he's "broken" the record and is "headed" to jail. This looks like it may be the last time we hear about him on this blog for quite some time... I hope.

The next portion of a good flashback episode is recounting all of the funny and favorite moments. Here are a few of mine:

From The American Voter

...So I asked a question that seemed only logical. I said, "You seem really concerned about that [issue], have you read up on Hillary's stance on the illegal immigration problem?"

"You know, that's a good idea!" Came her response. "That's a good idea!" Not only had she not done it, it hadn't even crossed her mind!


From Here's my free speech:
2) What if (God forbid) the student went Virginia Tech on the audience? Would we not be saying, "Why didn't they stop him? Why did they allow him to go over his time limit? Couldn't they see he was losing control?" Aren't way too many people trying to blame VT's decisions of that day for the tragedy? Seems to me the police would be the favorite target if they didn't do anything as well. Sorry people-who-daily-put-their-lives-in-jeopardy-so-that-I-can-feel-safe-while-I-sip-my-$8.57-(not-including-tip)-grande-mocha-latte-complaining-about-the-war-in-another-country-that-I'm-not-really-feeling-the-effects-of-while-I-offer-zero-solutions-to-solve-it, you're wrong no matter what you do.


From: Speaking at Harvard:

The following is a survey for potential speakers at Harvard University.

Please fill out the following questionnaire to determine your suitability for speaking at the prestigious Harvard University:


1) Are you:

A) The leader of the free world?
B) A very successful business man?
C) White
D) The leader of an international terrorist organization?
E) Anyone who strongly disagrees with the current administration?
If your answer is A, B, or C, please stop here, you are not suitable to speak at Harvard.

If you answer was D, please answer the following:

2) Which best describes you:

A) I am a reformed terrorist. I have turned in many of my former comrades in destruction.
B) I support them only with money. I have not attended any training camps.
C) I desire to see the entirety of America in flames
If your answer is A or B, please stop here, you are not suitable to speak at Harvard.

If your answer to question 1 was E, please answer the following:

3) Which best describes you:

A) I voice my dissent at the voting booth only.
B) I actively campaigned for an opponent of this administration who was not a Libertarian
C) I have been arrested more times than I can count because of my demonstrating against this administration
If your answer is A or B, please stop here, you are not suitable to speak at Harvard.

If you have made it this far, please answer yes or no to the following:

4) Do you know what an IED is?
5) Have you ever strapped one to your body?
6) Do you think Clinton should be able to serve a third term?
7) Do you think Christians should still be fed to lions?
8) Would you consider your political views "Left of the Left?"
If you answered "No" to any of these questions, please stop here, you are not suitable to speak at Harvard.

If you have made it this far, please submit this form to Harvard for further consideration. We will interview you to make sure there is absolutely nothing that appears to be common sense or main stream thought emitting from your mouth. After all, we must be open minded at such a prestigious educational institution. If you are not suitable to speak at Harvard, please go take a flying leap. Maybe Yale will take you. You may enjoy the post below this one regarding the NFL.

Please be aware: If you are the most successful African American Female in US government, you are welcome to speak at Harvard but you will face massive protests and name calling.

Thank you,
The Harvard Board of Directors


(And while we are on the subject of people speaking at universities...) Check out Yup Not In Your Name

From Living in the US is so taxing!:
I wonder if I would care that I was so taxed if I felt like there was something to show for it besides roads that there isn't enough money to repave, schools that are turning out children who can pass a certain standardized test, a boarder patrol that has more holes than OJ's alibi, a judicial branch that likes making laws and a legislative that is afraid to, health care that costs more than me taxes, and money to fund free abortions for minors rather than properly fund our foster care system. But that's probably asking too much.


From Not going anywhere for a while?:
The top ten reasons that I would want to be President:
10) To win a "popular election" because just over 20% of the entire US population actually voted for me. (Another 17% voted for the other guy, and 63% stayed home)
...
6) To hit the entire talk show circuit while campaigning (making sure to get on Oprah twice)
5) To be considered wrong by at least 50% of the US population
...
3) To spend $5,000,000 to get a job that pays $250,000 per year with a $100,000 per year pension once I'm done. All the while I get to age thirty years in the course of eight. Sign me up!
2) To know that at all times there are at least four people plotting my assassination and one Vice President who wishes one of them would succeed.
And the number one reason that I would want to be president:
1) To be impersonated on SNL!


Of course, there are always those posts that are simply impossible to excerpt. The good ones tend to fall in a few categories. Here they are:

In the interest of bettering society, I had two posts that were dedicated to recommendations that made things better:
Sports
The Oscars

Then there are the social posts:
Are we patients or customers?
Should we abstain from abstinence programs?
To Santa or not to Santa...

Finally, the political posts:
Kennedy
Generic
The War

Last but not least, it's time for "amazing moments." As we end our look back we actually have two moments to share from the same post:

I wrote these predictions on January 11th:
Saturday 8:30pm
Jacksonville at New England (-10)
The Jaguars are the sexy pick this week. Supposedly, their "power running game" will keep Brady off the field the entire game. Here's the problem: The Jaguar's can't hold a lead. They blew 14 and 18 point leads against Pittsburgh, a team that lost 34-13 to New England at home! Even if Jacksonville gets a lead, it better be 20+ or they don't stand a chance. And let's not forget that Belichick somehow always finds a way to take away what you are best at. Watch for the potent double barrelled running game of Jones-Drew and Taylor to amass 78 yards on the ground. Then watch Garrard throw to his favorite targets Samuel, Harrison, and Hobbs. Sorry, Jacksonville, your journey ends in Foxboro. Patriots and the points.


Unfortunately, The Patriots were unable to hold the Jaguars to 78 yards. Jacksonville rushed for 80. I was two yards off! And the Patriots won by 11, covering the spread.

This prediction was over shadowed, however, by the one that followed immediately after it:
Sunday 1pm
San Diego at Indianapolis (-10)
Originally, I had San Diego going into the Peyton-dome and walking out an easy winner. However, with Gates hurt, that leaves only Chambers for the Indy DBs to really concern themselves with. So, with two men on Chambers, that leaves 9 to tackle LT. However, Indy is still without Harrison and Freeny and Cromartie seemed to bewilder Peyton in their last meeting. This is definitely the hardest game to call. I know that it will be close. In the end, I'm going with my gut and saying that Rivers and company will shock Indy, winning by 4. Peyton will fail to convert on a fourth and mid during his bid for a game winning drive. San Diego outright.


People called me crazy. They said I didn't know anything about football. What happened? Peyton threw an incomplete pass on 4th and 6 to Dallas Clark on their final drive and lost to the Chargers by a score of 28-24. Whose crazy now?

Well, it took me from April of 2006 to January of 2008 to reach 200. Hopefully, 300 (which was a great movie, by the way) won't take me nearly that long!

Thanks for joining me on this trip back, I hope you'll join me on the journey forward!

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Dinner with Democrats

I hope that someday I am fortunate enough to be invited to dinner with Congressional Democrats. And I hope that, after they've supped their full and we've each paid our portion of the bill, the waitress returns saying we've over paid and that the restaurant needs to return some money to us. You see, I will have only ordered water, yet when the refund arrives at our table, I will request that a portion of it go to me even though I did not pay a dime towards the bill. Sound ridiculous? I agree.

Yet Congressional Democrats are threatening not to pass Bush's bill designed to stimulate the economy by giving a little extra money back to each tax payer because there is no provision in it to give money to people who don't make enough to pay taxes. They want to block the refund because it's only being refunded to people who actually paid.

Please don't get me wrong: I'm not against helping people who don't even make enough money to pay taxes. I'm all for getting them job training so they can advance in their careers. I agree with helping them put healthy food on their tables. Providing they are law abiding people, let's send their kids to school. But please don't take something that is labeled a "refund" and try to require that to goes to everyone! What if Best Buy had a rebate program and the Dems required that the rebate go to everyone, not just the people who bought the 47in HD Plasma TV? Or if Six Flags had to close due to the weather and offered to provide "rain date" tickets to the people who were there, but the Left demanded they provide the free passes to everyone. Doesn't make much sense, does it? If Six Flags wanted to provide promotional free tickets, I'd say, "go right ahead!" I'd be firmly behind Best Buy mailing out promotional gift cards to anyone and everyone. But don't call it a refund, rebate, or return. If you want to give a handout to people who didn't pay taxes, find another way to do it. Pass a different bill. But don't try to call it something it isn't.

Honestly, I think this is simply an excuse that the (D)s are using to block this attempt to revitalize the economy. The longer it's down, the more likely they'll take the Oval Office in November. It's hard when you are not the party in power. You have to hope that the country does poorly so that you can take over. So the stock market drop is fantastic for them, as is the housing slump, and the last thing they want to do right now is pass any bill that will end the dreaded "r-word" discussion. But they can't look like they are trying to keep the economy down (or that they are hoping our troops fail) ["I don't know, fly casual!"] so they have to find a reason that they hope will disguise their true intentions. I believe it was their hope that asking that money be "returned" to people who never had it in the first place would be sufficient. It is my hope that they are wrong.

And that's just my opinion. What's yours?

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

All Four Super Bowl Previews II

What a weekend! Both America's team and America's QB fail to make it to the Conference Games! (Only one of which I was fortunate enough to predict.) While we're on the subject, I just want to point out that I went 3 out of 4 last week and had Dallas been able to eek out a three point win by actually scoring at the end of the game instead of being wrongfully penalized and then tossing a pick, I'd have gone 4 for 4. How's that for predictions, Dr?

So, with the NFL's final four set, I'm going to take a few minutes to preview all four possible Super Bowls. This is one of my favorite posts of the year. (Check out All Four Super Bowl Previews Vol I)

One thing I'd like to point out is that, unlike last year, there isn't really a game that I'm praying doesn't happen. And, wouldn't you know it, last years big game was the very game that we all least desired to watch. Thankfully, we don't have that dilemma this year. All four games should be very competitive.

Alright, so from least interesting Super Bowl to most:

Green Bay vs San Diego
The biggest reason why this is the most boring Super Bowl is there's no real story line here. Sure, one team started out 1-3 and the other 10-0 but there's no interteam plot line. This is a difficult game to call. The teams match up well and near seems as though they'd run away with the game. I suppose I'd have to take into account that if the Chargers are there, they beat the Patriots. But they've got some "minor" (according to the team) injuries to Brees and LT. As I think this game would be close, and I don't see Favre letting this opportunity pass him by, I think the Pack would find a way to win. Final Score: 23-21 Green Bay

New York vs New England
Oh, just what the country needs: Another Brady/Manning rivalry! While I believe this game would be the second worst option for Joe Average-NFL-Fan, with all of the Giants fans that I know, this is probably the game I'd most like to see. Then there's the rematch angle: They didn't win the first time they attempted to thwart the Patriots historic quest, perhaps they can succeed the second time. I have to apologize to my brother-in-law, I don't think the Giants are a very good team. If they manage to over come the Packers, I don't see how they can stop the juggernaut that is the Patriots. (Getting this far in the playoffs is probably one of the worst things that could have happened to the Giants. Now Coughlin won't leave for a few more years!) I've heard people say that the Giants won because you don't beat the same team three times in a year. Well, you can do it twice. Final Score: 38-20 New England

New York vs San Diego
This match up probably has the best story-line for the marketing of the game. Eli Manning was originally drafted by the Chargers but he refused to play for them because they were so bad at the time. The Giants traded draft picks for him. With those picks the Chargers got Rivers, Merriman, and Kaeding, three massive keys to their success. So, who made the better deal? If this is the match up for the Super Bowl, here is where we find out. And the answer? Final Score: 28-17 San Diego

Green Bay vs New England
This is the game the networks and NFL exec's want. The up and comer in Brady vs the time tested soldier in Favre. The rematch of Super Bowl XXXI where the Packers defeated the Patriots 35-21 in 1997. This is a tough match up. While the Patriots have proven they can stop the run, Green Bay has some very good cornerbacks who could reek havoc on Brady's passing plans. And let's not forget that New England's pass rush often flushes QB's out of the pocket. While I'm already eating my words regarding Favre's returning this year, he's still no spring chicken. If he has to scramble too much, he may be forced to make a mistake or two, and that's all the Patriots need. It really is a toss-up which game (this one or the NY-NE) I'd prefer. Of the elite eight NFL teams (DAL, NYG, GB, SEA, IND, JAX, SD) the only two the Patriots haven't defeated this year are Green Bay and Seattle. If the Patriots can face off and defeat the Pack, they'd have beaten 9 out of the 11 playoff teams. Missing only Seattle and Tampa Bay (two teams whose playoff ability was questionable at best.) That is an amazing feat. Final Score: 38-24 Patriots

Which ever teams face off in the big dance this year. It's sure to be exciting. Especially if the Patriots are making a bid at history!

Friday, January 11, 2008

Playoff predictions

I'm sure you are all eagerly awaiting my Divisional round playoff predictions so you can run to Vegas (or Atlantic City, depending on which is closer) and put your life savings on the exact opposite of what I predict. So let's get started:

Saturday 4pm
Seatle at Green Bay (-7)
Somehow I managed to pick both NFC games wrong last week and both AFC games correct. (I wouldn't be crushed if the same happened this week as well...) Seattle's running game is still not what it needs to be to get past Green Bay. Hasselbeck makes too many poor decisions in his throwing game to pass the Seahawks past the Packers, especially with Woodson and Harris covering Seattle's WRs. People talk about playoff experience (Seattle by far outweighs GB in that category) but I'll take GB's talent over Seattle's experience. Green Bay and the points.

Saturday 8:30pm
Jacksonville at New England (-10)
The Jaguars are the sexy pick this week. Supposedly, their "power running game" will keep Brady off the field the entire game. Here's the problem: The Jaguar's can't hold a lead. They blew 14 and 18 point leads against Pittsburgh, a team that lost 34-13 to New England at home! Even if Jacksonville gets a lead, it better be 20+ or they don't stand a chance. And let's not forget that Belichick somehow always finds a way to take away what you are best at. Watch for the potent double barrelled running game of Jones-Drew and Taylor to amass 78 yards on the ground. Then watch Garrard throw to his favorite targets Samuel, Harrison, and Hobbs. Sorry, Jacksonville, your journey ends in Foxboro. Patriots and the points.

Sunday 1pm
San Diego at Indianapolis (-10)
Originally, I had San Diego going into the Peyton-dome and walking out an easy winner. However, with Gates hurt, that leaves only Chambers for the Indy DBs to really concern themselves with. So, with two men on Chambers, that leaves 9 to tackle LT. However, Indy is still without Harrison and Freeny and Cromartie seemed to bewilder Peyton in their last meeting. This is definitely the hardest game to call. I know that it will be close. In the end, I'm going with my gut and saying that Rivers and company will shock Indy, winning by 4. Peyton will fail to convert on a fourth and mid during his bid for a game winning drive. San Diego outright.

Sunday 4:30pm
New York Giants at Dallas (-10)
I have bad news for the Giants. Peyton has to play his own game this week and he isn't going to be able to wear his brother's #10 and play in his stead. So Eli will have to play against the Cowboys. This means the Giants will lose. TO played on a broken leg in the Super Bowl, I think he can handle a sprained ankle. Jessica has promised that she won't be at the game so Romo will be his regular self. However, I don't think it will be a blowout. Dallas peaked a few weeks ago, but too many injuries for New York means that Dallas will host the NFC Championship game next week. Dallas wins, New York covers.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Local Politics Gone Wrong

This one is really long, but it just goes to show what can happen in politics, even at the local level, if we don't keep a keen eye on things!

Few things annoy me more than politics. Even fewer things annoy me more than dirty politics. And I find local politics to be the dirtiest! These are men and women with political aspirations who know that they will never be going to Washington. They also know that if they milk the system, the worst they'd get is a couple of years. Perhaps they start out meaning well, but many of them see the dollar sign at the end of the political rainbow.

I've railed about an excellent example of this that occurred in Connecticut a few years ago. (The state eventually won, forcing out the homeowners and allowing the land to be developed by a private developer. I'm sure no one's pockets were lined in that fiasco!) Funny thing, I stumble upon yet another perfect example of local politics flexing imaginary muscles. Wouldn't you know it, it's happening in Connecticut! In the small town of Farmington.

Farmington has a "Planning & Zoning" department that makes laws about what you can and cannot do on your own property. Basically, the entire town is a condo association where the citizens don't really have a say regarding the regulations. One of the "laws" they have on the books is one that states that if you have a trailer/recreational vehicle of any kind (travel trailer, motorhome, boat, etc) it must be stored behind the longest rear wall of your home. Mind you, there are people in this town who don't have enough room to store their 30ft trailer so that it is entirely behind the longest rear wall of their home. The town is effectively saying that these people are not allowed to have such a vehicle.

But wait, it gets worse. Not only does the town invade it's citizen's privacy by dictating what they can and can't do on the property they own and pay taxes on, but they have the gaul to engage in selective enforcement regarding who they will and won't force to comply with the zoning regulation! One person faces fines because their boat is parked in their drive way while another doesn't even know the regulation exists because they've never been bothered about the 38ft fifth wheel they've got in their front yard.

This is the foundation of the two stories that I've come across that make me livid. There are at least two Farmington residents who are being forced to comply with these regulations even though they are exempt due to the grandfather clause. People already engaged in an activity that is now forbidden are grandfathered in and are not required to comply. For example, if the driving age were increased to 19 years of age, anyone between the ages of 16 and 19 who already had their licenses would be "grandfathered" in. They would not be forced to return their driver's licenses. Now, this regulation has been around for about 20 years. Which means anyone who's grandfathered has been a Farmington resident for a long, looong time. Which also means these people aren't the youngest residents.

It doesn't end there. The power hungry local government representative has been informing these residents that they need to file an appeal. The problem is, if they file the appeal they waive their grandfather right and place themselves within the bounds of the regulation!

I found two stories regarding a 30 year resident who is an older single mom of two and a 40 year resident who is an 80 year old grandfather. Both of these people have been slammed with fines and citations because of the locations of their trailers that are not subject to the regulation. Both of these people have been purposefully misinformed by the Planning and Zoning department in the hopes that they will comply and unknowingly waive their grandfather rights.

All this from a town that charges so much in property taxes that the elderly are being forced to sell their homes and leave. This from a town who's budget is 83 million dollars this year (71 million from property taxes). There are just over 25,000 people living in this town! That's over $2,840 per person! Not even per household! (Wikipedia estimates there were about 9,000 households in 2005. That'd be nearly $8,000 per household!) Farmington really needs to further harass their elderly? They need to extort more money from them from fines that never should have been issued? They need to deceive them into giving up a grandfather right they have a legal claim to?

Farmington should be ashamed of themselves. And these pitiful power hungry local politicians need to find something better to do with their time and energy.

The CBS affiliate in Connecticut covered one of the stories. Read about it here.

Too bad Farmington just had their elections. The entire town council should be voted out. Not only are they allowing the Planning and Zoning representative to take these underhanded actions, but they couldn't even approve a mill rate freeze for senior citizens. What a joke. What does a town of 25,000 need with $83,000,000 per year?

Oh, one final thing. They only increased the mill rate by 2.4% this year. Somehow this was something that the council deserved a pat on the back for because they didn't raise it any further.

Friday, January 04, 2008

The American Voter

Today, I had a conversation with the quintesencial American voter.

One of the first things she said after mentioning the Iowa caucuses was that she was voting for Clinton. "We don't want another Republican in office, that's for sure!" She said.

Ok, I'm listening.

You see, she's from Nevada and she proceeded to go on a 7 minute tyraid about how the illegals are destroying her state. They are taking jobs, not paying taxes, taking housing, and using undeserved state programs. "They drive up in their 2007 Cadilacs and get their food stamp cards." She went on to say that there were a whole bunch of them living in the low income housing developement near her neighborhood and that she, and all of her neighbors, had been robbed by the illegals.

Now, was she being racist? Yes. Is it a guarentee that they were robbed by illegals? No. Was she sure that the problem of the illegals was the most important issue for this election? Yes.

As I was at work, I was unable to betray my own leanings. So I asked a question that seemed only logical. I said, "You seem really concerned about that, have you read up on Hillary's stance on the illegal immigration problem?"

"You know, that's a good idea!" Came her response. "That's a good idea!" Not only had she not done it, it hadn't even crossed her mind!

The American voter casts their ballot based on criteria at which I can't even venture a guess. The issues? There's a novel idea!

I can't help but think of the time of Judges and Kings, when the Lord gave them over to the desires of their hearts! Dear God, no!

Thursday, January 03, 2008

Kids these days

Today's youth have it so hard! I was listening to one complain about her older brother the other day. She said, "It stinks! He listens to his Ipod so loud in the car that, even though he sits behind me in the mini van, I can hardly watch the movie!"

I don't think there's anything else I have to say about that.